Word of the Year

For several years Erik and I have picked a word of the year.  Kind of a motto, or even a reset.  If something doesn't fit into the idea we've decided to pursue for the year, it helps us to determine whether or not it's a good fit for us.  Last year, we really didn't settle on a word.  I am not going to say that was a good or bad thing.  We had a good year.  We learned lots of lessons, we stretched ourselves, and grew by leaps and bounds.  But this year, I need direction.  And, truly, the Lord has been pressing in lately.  I want that, He's been showing me my successes and my short comings.  He's always full of grace when I need it, but He's been revealing areas in my life where I can grow and improve.  With all of this in mind, I took my word from the scriptures. 

Less.  Less of me, as the Scripture says.  More of Jesus.  But also less of many other things.  Less social media, less unhealthy food and drinks (I'm looking at you, coffee), less worrying over things I cannot change. Less stuff, less commitments, less worrying about pleasing others and more pleasing God, more time for my children, more time for my husband, more traveling, more of a relationship with my creator, more serving, more saving, less truly is more.  So why not choose more for my word?  Because the underlying theme for me is to be ok with only what the Lord thinks of me.  To be ok that everyone thinks we are crazy for living half way around the world AND choosing to do it again.  Less worry and more focus on who I truly am, and what I'm truly meant for. I want to find my calling, I want to live it out. I want to live well... I want to finish strong.  Finish my days, my months, any task I choose to take on, any goals I may set, all of these things... I want to finish them well. I want to work as though I am working for the Lord, in all things.  I need a refocus.  And I think Less is my refocus.  So... I'll keep you posted on how that goes for me... and for my family. 

Happy New Year from Sri Lanka.  You'll be seeing less of us on Social Media but what you see will be so much better. We will be better. 2018 will be our Best YEAR YET!  Prayers for our family as we pray for yours.

Love you all.

Honoring Holiday Traditions While Living Overseas

We get tons of questions from friends and family members about life overseas.  One of the more frequently asked ones is "How do you celebrate _____ overseas?" Whether it be Halloween, Easter, Thanksgiving or Christmas.  Having been through a year of celebrations now, I feel like we have found a good balance between honoring the important traditions of our family and the things we love most about the holidays and being open to a new type of normal.

I'll start off by saying that we are truly fortunate.  Because we are in the foreign service we have an Embassy staff that helps keep the "American" feel of certain holidays.  For example, they put on a wonderful Halloween festival yearly.  It allows our kids to dress up, "trick or treat" and enjoy fun and games.

Our Little Unicorns at the Embassy Halloween Carnival

Rosie The Riveter and James Dean heading to the Marine Halloween Party

They do this with Easter, Christmas, and other holiday celebrations as well.  It helps keep us connected to other Americans, our traditions, and takes away some of the loneliness that can accompany the holidays for some.

While these activities are invaluable, really the key to having a "Happy Holiday" while living overseas is figuring out that balance between linking old traditions with new ones. For example, last halloween, our kids carved pineapples for the holiday.  It was fun and they enjoyed the tradition of carving while embracing our new island.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.  Back home Thanksgiving with my family meant more to me than any other time of the year.  I absolutely loved to be at my mom and dad's house for Thanksgiving.  The food is amazing and its practically the same menu I have been eating since I was old enough to remember.  I love that there is no other competition - no gifts, no extra parties... just a day to enjoy family.  My sister and I always do the black friday shopping when we are together.  It's hilarious, sometimes we buy a ton, sometimes, nothing.  Almost always we laugh hysterically and stay out all night! It is a time I cherish more than anything.  Thanksgiving last year was hard because I realized how truly far we are from friends and family, but it was also good.  It helped me see that it's a time to be thankful, and family can take on many different faces.  We celebrated with friends, we ate, laughed and enjoyed the day. This year, the friend's faces changed as happens in this lifestyle, but we still had an amazing time celebrating and counting our blessings with new friends.

Our "Friends"giving was such a fun way to enjoy yummy food and great company!

Blurry picture alert!  But a new tradition began this year.  Erik and the girls made the pumpkin pie for dessert!

Although "weight" is a big deal in our lifestyle, and can sometimes affect our decision to bring along "frivilous" extras.      We always make a point to decorate for every holiday.  It makes our home feel like ours and reminds us of all the fun ways to celebrate whatever the holiday may be. 

Last Christmas Erik's mom was here to celebrate.  It was a good first year because we had family here.  I didn't know how this year would go, but it was truly amazing.  I think we started a new tradition by putting our tree up REALLY EARLY. 

But it was fun, and we binged on hallmark movies and of course our favorite family classic Christmas movies.  We baked... a lot... we shopped, we wrapped gifts, we stuck close to our family traditions of eating on our china every night in the month of December.

I have shared Aunt Evon's Sugar cookie recipe HERE

Christmas Shopping at Pettah Market.

Our December Tradition of eating off of our fine china continued.

The family Elves found us, so of course they hid and caused mischief.

We did a family advent study, and participated in the Carols Service at church.

But we branched out some too.  There are many here, especially with the embassy construction that don't have families with them.  That meant we opened our home on Christmas Eve to some new faces. It was a magical night filled with laughs, lots of food and some great memories.  I am so thankful we got to meet even more new friends!

So now on to the point of this entire blog:

1.     The most important thing in this life is to realize that some things will never change no matter where you are.  There will always be people that need "family" to be around or a home cooked meal.  Those people may be other embassy families, they may be someone down on their luck, they may be someone experiencing their first Christmas/Thanksgiving/Mother's day without a loved one - who knows.  But we are called as Christians to offer hospitality.  And although that may look different from year to year, opening your home is a tradition in itself.

2.     You can honor your traditions anywhere in any way you like.  I didn't get to go black friday shopping with my sister, however, we face timed, we laughed together and we still had time to connect.  And as a family, we hung out poolside all day on "black friday" it was amazing and I enjoyed every minute of it.

"Different isn't always bad, different can be fun."  This is a saying that Anna's kindergarten teacher used to always tell the kids.  It's so true.  So your day may not look like it used to, it may not even look like it was planned to, but it can still be fun.  That is an attitude that you can choose.  It is hard sometimes, trust me, I know, but it can be so so good, if you commit to be positive about the experience.

3.     Just because you aren't sad doesn't mean you don't miss your family or your "old way of life."  I know for many foreign service families and expats, they grew up in this life, so following in their families' footsteps is just par for the course, but in our situation, we uprooted our family to embark on this adventure.  Our kids had life long friends, we had lifelong friends, we had family traditions, we had family that looked forward to holidays with us, planned around our schedule, tried to make any occasion special for our children.  They love us and were our biggest support group.  Leaving that was the hardest decision we ever made.  I have now spent two Christmases away from my parents, sister, brother-in-law, precious nephews and niece. We have been separated from cousins and aunts and uncles.  Did we miss them this year? Yes, terribly.  Did we spend some nights reminiscing about holidays of the past, either when we were children or even since we have been married?  Of course we did.  Were we sad?  No, we were not.  Why?  Because we didn't allow ourselves to be.  We decided that we were too blessed to spend any holiday fretting about not physically seeing family members.  We would connect with them via face time, we would pray for them, talk to them, then we would commit to making memories that our children will be able to reminisce about when they are  grown.  Whether or not they're spending the holidays with us or not.

I struggled with the title of this blog post because my first inclination was to title it something like making it through holidays as an expat or in a foreign country, something like that, but the truth is I didn't make it through.   The Lindholms thrived during this fall, Thanksgiving, and Christmas seasons.  And that will carry on into our new year.  Foreign Service life is hard, Sri Lanka is hard, but we are better for these experiences.

What are your some traditions that follow you anywhere? I wanna hear!

Negombo

While the kids and I were in the States for the summer, Erik found a cute little town north of Colombo called Negombo.  Negombo was settled by the Portuguese and therefore you will actually see more churches on street corners than buddhist temples in this area.  It's full of busy fish markets and some beautiful coastline.

After Erik's little tour of Negombo, he put it on our bucket list.  We headed out early for a beach day at the Jetwing Beach Hotel in Negombo.  It is only about an hour's drive north of Colombo, so for a family that despises roll away beds and suitcases, it makes for the perfect day trip.

The cost to use the hotel and beach facilities was about 4500 lkr which amounts to a little over $30.00.  We opted not to eat the buffet offered on the weekends because our kids are quite picky, instead we just enjoyed the pool bar with it's fish and chips, chicken satay and burgers.  We found a shady spot under a coconut tree, and enjoyed the view.

It was a perfect way to spend a Saturday on a reasonable budget.  And as I mentioned earlier, for a family that really wanted to avoid packing yet another suitcase, it was the perfect get away.

Things I will do differently next time:
There is a neat little coffee shop right outside of the hotel.  I think a coffee and breakfast stop there would be nice.
There is a very good looking sushi restaurant right down from the hotel for dinner on the way home.
Our adventures are modified to our family dynamic.  Meaning, we stick to a hotel that provides us with all we need, but just the same, our kids see lots of the world, they otherwise wouldn't know existed, and we get some sun and sand in the process.

Travel with kids? How are your getaways modified?

Big Boy Bed

Part 2 of my Sri Lankan Home Tour feature's George's room.  His room has been hard for me because we have recently transitioned from a crib to his "Big Boy Bed"

Since the transition I haven't slept through the night.  He doesn't stay in his bed.  He "enjoys" the freedom of roaming around at night and climbing into bed with me.  It has been trying.

I have enjoyed, however, setting up his big boy room.  I have challenged myself to only use what we brought with us to decorate his room.  In a lifestyle where everything is viewed by how much weight it adds, I think this is a must.  I only packed what I truly valued.  Hence his collage wall.   These are the items we had in his very first nursery that meant so much to me, and I wanted to repeat them.  You can see a similar set up in our Reston home, and now here.

The old recliner has to stay... because this mama still rocks her baby at night.  And I will for as long as he will allow me to.

When we moved in, there was an armoire for hanging clothes in his room.  Just last weekend I moved it into a nook in our hallway in order to use a bookshelf to hold some of the favorite toys that continue to find their way into his room, despite the fact that we have a playroom full of space for trucks, blocks, and all other toys.

Gray has been a staple in our home for a while now.  I view it as a neutral and this spread from Restoration Hardware will go wherever we go.  Forever. Til the end of time. Amen.

George has no interest in the potty that we bought.  In fact it is actually used to carry his toys around.  So, we are still bound to a changing pad.  But, like I said, he's still my baby. And, as a friend's very wise father once said "No baby ever goes to college in diapers" so... we will keep that changing pad around a little longer.

The drapes, furniture and very beige rug came as part of housing.  I think I would like to make changes to the drapes and rug in our next post, but since we are already one year into our two year post, I think I am going to just let them be.

All in all, I love this room.  I love that he is using the bedside lamp I used as a little girl.  I love that plane mobile I found on Etsy, I love that the pieces on his collage wall were collected with love by friends and family.  It's happy in here.  I am good with that. 

Lastly, because I am all about keeping it real... I wanted to show all of my American friends the  GLAM of living overseas... under the mini split AC is the dehumidifier that runs all day, every day and is emptied up to twice a day in the rainy season.  Also, you will see the lovely bars on the windows... a staple in most Embassy homes here. Thanks for coming on my little tour.  Next up... who knows ...

Top 5 Ways to Prepare for Life as an Expat

I've been an expat for over a year now, so I feel that qualifies me to offer expert advice ;-)
Truly, though, having had time to reflect on what did and didn't work with our transition overseas, I have compiled a list of my top 5 preparations you can make to lesson the stress of an overseas move.

• LEARN ABOUT YOUR NEW HOME  

  What is the climate? Knowing what kind of weather you are moving into will help both physically and mentally prepare you.  We found out ahead of time when the monsoon seasons were for Sri Lanka - that helped me prepare for what to pack in our suitcases, what to ship, and didn't knock my socks off when I experienced my first week of solid rain.

What can you learn about the culture?  While I truly nothing can prepare you for living in a different culture, knowing some about it will prove ever helpful.  In some places it is rude not to accept a gift, even if it is lavish and you feel uncomfortable accepting it.  Some cultures kiss on the cheek as greeting, some bow.  Some cultures consider it scandalous to show your shoulders, or have your head uncovered.  When I first arrived in Sri Lanka, I quickly realized people don't like to say no to you, they just do a little head bob and never address the request.  We offered to pay a man 3 times to hang a swing for us.  After waiting 2 months, we realized he didn't want to, thus never responding to our missed calls or emails.  Understanding the cultural differences lessens the stress of the transition.

What is the main religion of your new home? Even if you don't consider yourself religious or affiliate with any type of religion, the main religion of an area can affect your every day life.  Case in point: Sri Lanka is Buddhist - every full moon - Poya Day is a holiday, and stores don't sell meat on those days.

Do you need to know the language?  While English is the universal language, it is essential to know the native language in some countries.  It would be helpful to find out ahead of time if some language training would be helpful. 

• KNOW YOURSELF

One of my favorite Friends episodes is when Monica leaves a message on Richard's answering machine  and ends it with "I'm Breezy"  if you were as obsessed with friends as I was, you know that Monica was anything but Breezy.  Big changes go so much better when you know yourself.  Is there something that you will really be sad if you have to live without?  Maybe a favorite snack or shampoo? Make arrangements to bring it.  For me it was my kitchen aid mixer.  I  LOVE my kitchen aid.  Even though it weighs a TON and I have to run it through a transformer, I brought it.  And that made me so happy!  I knew I would feel like I sacrificed if I left it in storage.  And to be honest, there were  are times I feel like I am sacrificing enough.  

• LOWER YOUR EXPECTATIONS

Have you ever seen people's pictures of their Caribbean Vacation?  You know the ones, toes in the sugar white sand, clear blue sea. Dreamy, huh?  However, the beach is just the perimeter of the island, and in the town you're cautioned not to drink the water,  look out for pick pockets or stray dogs.  It isn't all sun and sand.  The sooner you lower your expectations about your new home, the quicker you will fall in love with the place it really is, not the place you perceived it to be. 

•  BE COMFORTABLE WINGING IT

I cannot tell you how many times in the past year we just decided to "go" with it.  Vacations, holidays, transportation, even restaurants - there comes a point when the new country wins.  Things are done they way they decide to do it and you just have to go with it.  Forget how you imagined it, forget how you would do it better, forget that it may or may not be the safest thing in the world and just go with it.  Be comfortable with good enough.  It doesn't have to become the standard, but in some instances you just look around and say "that works" and move on.  Trust me, the more you compare, dwell, or over think, the more stressful it will be. 

• GO EASY ON YOURSELF

You have decided to live in a foreign country for a set period of time.  You have already taken a greater leap than most people in the world.  So you get homesick?  That's ok!  You have a meltdown at the market? Go Ahead!  You accidentally tip a HUGE amount because you get the currency exchange confused - give yourself grace.  The changes happening all around you are huge.  Everything is different, and there will be bumps in the road.  Learn to laugh it off and log it for next time around.

When I look back over my first year abroad there are many moments that I am proud and many I am not so proud of.  Realizing I could have prepared better mentally was a regret.  But like any learning experience, come next post... you can bet I will be rereading this list.  Maybe each move will be a little better than the last.

Any veteran expats reading this? Hit me with your best tips for Mentally prepping for your move.

Kumbucha

While I was home this summer, I got a tutorial from a friend on making Kumbucha.  She has really been into gut health for a while now, and she shared some of her "buch" with me while we watched the kids play in the pool.  For me, it was love at first sip!  The taste is similar to a hard cider, and it has fizz!  Feels like you're drinking a treat, like coke or some fruity fizzy yumminess... but it is good for you!

Here is a little information on Kumbucha.  It's a fermented tea that is started when you brew regular tea and combine with with 1 cup of sugar.  The sugar feeds the SCOBY (Symbiotic colony of bacteria and yeast) and aids in fermentation.  As the tea ferments it creates a natural carbonation.  Kumbucha helps add healthy bacteria to your gut.  As a part of my "Fit by 40" goal, I am trying to learn how to listen to my body and do what is best for it.  Living in a foreign country and eating new foods can wreak havoc on your tummy.  Kumbucha is one of the aids I find that helps regulate my gut.  If you want to know more about probiotics read this or you can follow my pinterest board.  I have learned so much, just from reading about other people's experiences. 

Since brewing my own Kumbucha, I have experimented with many flavors.  Ella's favorite is a blueberry ginger (I'll share that in another post) mine is a ginger lime, but today I tried a more "Fall Flavor"
Ginger Apple Cinnamon.

Here is what I did:
After my new batch of Kumbucha was fermented, I poured it into little bottles and dropped in a slice of green apple, cinnamon, and ginger.  I didn't do a second ferment for two reasons.
1. I am probably going to warm it and enjoy it that way instead of my normal over ice.

2. I had let the batch go for so long, it was already so fizzy when I added to the bottles that I figured it would be fizzy enough. 

I just poured it up, and popped them in the fridge.  I will let the flavors mix for about 24 hours before giving it a try...but I am very optomistic!

What are your favorite Kumbucha flavor Combos?  Please share!  I am always looking for something new to try!

Bidding Part 4

I have been sharing with you some of the more important considerations when deciding posts we would like to bid on.  I really could stretch this out into about 5 or 6 more posts, but as I am sharing these I am getting so many more ideas of things I want to share about.... so I am just going to sum the last considerations up into this final post. 

In Part 1 I talked about bidding in the foreign service.  Part 2 covered some considerations for our family.  Part 3 we covered education... it's a biggie.

Today, I am going to list our final considerations for choosing our next post options. 

1. Timing of the post.  Some posts are two year posts, some one year and some three year.  It's a priority for these next two posts to be three year cycles.  The reason behind this is that puts our kids on rotations to graduate after being at a post for three years.  For example, Ella is in 6th grade.  Next post will be 7-9 grades and the next post will be 10-12 grades.  It is not my wish for us to move either Ella or Anna's senior year in high school. 

2. The professional considerations for Erik's job experience.  He needs to consider the project size, type and if it will give him the experience he needs for what is best for his career.  Getting that to line up with your family preferences can be tricky ;-)

3.  Another consideration for us is to be in a more Christian minded place.  Sri Lanka is wonderful, but it is a Buddhist nation, Hindus are second, then Muslims, then wayyyyy down at the bottom there are Christians.  I am not delusional in thinking we will find some kind of bubble where everyone loves Jesus and we all just lift each other up daily... but we would love to find a post that has a little more of a Christ centered foundation.  Many central and South American countries are Catholic. 

4. Speaking of Central and South America... it would also be nice to be a little bit closer to the states.  Living 27+ hours away just feels so far, so disconnected from friends and family, and so so hard to get back home, if ever we needed to.  I think our preference would be to shorten our flight time and be maybe over in the Western Hemisphere... one can dream.

Ultimately we will fall back on our family mantra which is Proverbs 16:9
A man can make his plans but it is the Lord that directs his path.
 Resting in the comfort that as long as we are faithful in our research, use the minds the Lord has given us and keep His priorities in line with ours, God will direct our path along the way that will be successful for us.

It's an exciting time for the Lindholm party of 5. Who knows where we will end up!

Any other FSOs or Military families out there bidding on posts right now? How is it going? Let me hear from you!